Maps
by xxlovely
Summary: I wasn't lying when I said I'd go to the ends of the earth for Harvey Specter, there was nothing I wouldn't do. But disappearing, leaving everything I loved behind, just to protect him, just about killed me. They said our paths could never cross again, but Harvey and I never did like following instructions,my biggest regret? I never got the chance to tell him I love him.
1. Prologue

_But I wonder where were you_  
_When I was at my worst_  
_Down on my knees_  
_And you said you had my back_  
_So I wonder where were you_  
_When all the roads you took came back to me_  
_So I'm following the map that leads to you_

_-Maps, Maroon 5._

* * *

_**Prologue; Then.**_

She tried to keep a straight face, not wanting to show any emotion, but it proved to be harder than she originally thought. No one had told her anything; as far as she was concerned this could be a kidnapping or just an elaborate prank pulled by the guys at work. They had left the familiar surroundings of Manhattan over an hour ago, and she knew that wherever she was heading, wasn't in the City.

Her perfectly groomed eyebrows scrunched up in confusion as they pulled into a small airport, scattered with a handful of private helicopters and airplanes. She would have called Harvey to ask what was going on, but her phone had been taken off her before she was forcefully asked to step inside the car, if anything, right now she could be in grave danger. The car came to a halt in front of a large building, housing what looked like a very expensive aircraft. She inhaled deeply as someone opened her door, the bright sunlight blinding her as she let her eyes adjust from the dark confines of the car.

She slipped out the car elegantly, brushing down her teal colored dress as she let her gaze wonder her surroundings "Donna Paulsen?" She turned at the sound of her voice, her expression faltering slightly as she saw a man dressed in a black suit with the United States Government badge sewed to the shoulder.

She nodded slowly, realizing that even Harvey couldn't pull off a prank like this, this was real.

The mans expression softened as he noticed the fear etched across her face, her hands trembling as they laid by her side. He was a young man, perhaps the same age as Donna, yet the permanent bags under this eyes told you that the information trusted on him in his line of work, was taking it's toll. "Perhaps I should tell you why you're here."

She didn't reply, she wanted to, but words failed her, the sound of her erratic heart beat too distracting.

"Donna Paulsen, executive assistant to Harvey Specter at Pearson Hardman?" he asked, just to clarify what they both already knew, she nodded. "I'm Derek Heely with Homeland Security." He introduced himself, a slight smiling tugging at his lips, he felt bad for her, she knew that much. "It has come to our attention that Mr Specter unknowingly took on a client that we've been investigating for months regarding the threat of domestic terrorism"

Her eyes went wide; her mind racing as she mentally ran through all of Harvey's new clients, trying to figure out whom this guy was talking about. "Okay" she muttered, barely audible, a polite gesture to assure the man that she was listening.

"Upon researching about this client, which from your computer and telephone records proved you did on behalf of Mr Specter, you have unknowingly put our investigation at risk, by relaying classified information to the client which raised alarm bells."

"W-what information?" she stuttered, she knew that nothing she had discovered about any of the clients she was asked to run a background check on, had come back with anything out of the ordinary.

"That doesn't matter now, Ms Paulsen. What we do know is that these individuals know you are the source, therefore putting yourself and Mr Specter at danger if they believe they are about to be exposed"

"What are you trying to say?" she asked firmly, her voice gaining confidence, her initial fear for herself, now clouded by her worry for Harvey.

"We believe that until we have successfully reprimanded this group of individuals neither you or Mr Specter are safe remaining at Pearson Hardman, and New York City. It is our understanding that you are single and without immediate family?" he asked as Donna's heart sunk

"That's correct."

"See this plane?" he pointed to the small private jet, pilot standing by the door. "This aircraft will take you to an undisclosed location within the United States where you will be provided with a new identity and location until we are confident that you are out of risk"

Donna choked out a breath she didn't know she was holding, her head shaking continuously as she refused to believe the words that were being said to her. "No" she whispered, a wave of panic washing over her, tears welling up in her eyes. She hadn't anticipated this, perhaps if she had, she would have worn waterproof mascara.

"I'm afraid we have no choice in the matter"

She ran her hands through her hair, trying to make sense of it all, how could she just leave her life behind without a second thought… How could she leave, him. "What about Harvey?"

"Don't worry Ms Paulsen, Mr Specter will remain as he is, under the close surveillance of the government, he is unaware, but he will be protected."

"I don't want to go" she begged, feeling embarrassed for letting her emotions overcome her like this, a tear escaping from her eyes.

"I am sorry Ms Paulsen, but to keep Harvey Specter safe, we have to remove the target from his back."

"C-can I talk to him? Please? I can't just leave. What about my family, my friends?"

"We will inform your family, but no direct contact can be made, only through US Marshals. They cannot know your location. As for Mr Specter we cannot allow any form of communication for the long term future, until we are guaranteed that you are both safe."

She closed her eyes, letting her head fall back to look to the sky as she let the tears roll down her cheeks, when did life get this complicated? She asked herself, still hoping that any second she would wake up from this ridiculous dream and tell Harvey all about it. "So, I'm entering Witness Protection?"

"Not in the conventional sense, but yes, a program similar. We have every intention of returning you to your old life at some point, however we cannot say with confidence when that will be."

"What will you tell people?" she asked, in reference to her just disappearing, people would worry, she was loved around the office, her lack of presence would be known.

"We tell them nothing. We can grant you one contact who you can communicate with through secure telephone lines, however they can not be a relative or Harvey Specter, to prevent raising suspicion. They will be instructed to keep anything discussed between the two of you confidential, including your whereabouts."

She wanted to pull her hair out, she wanted to kick, scream, cry, but she couldn't, everything was moving too fast for her brain to register what was happening. She found herself nodding, blurting out Mike Ross' name without a second thought, as she was escorted to the aircraft. She looked at the man who had ruined her life, not knowing whether she wanted to hug him or punch him in the groin, she was Donna Paulsen for crying out loud, how do you say goodbye to that?

She took her seat as the plane closed its doors and taxied towards the runway, her body rigid as she finally let her mind fall on him. She let out a shaky breath, knowing that this was the right move, that even though she was sacrificing everything she had worked for, everything she loved, it was all worth it to ensure that Harvey was safe. She had said on numerous occasions that she would go to the ends of the earth for Harvey Specter, but now, she really was. Who knew when their paths would meet again, if they would ever meet again? Her body jerked as sobs racked through her fragile frame, regrets bubbling to the surface, as she couldn't hold it in anymore.

Donna didn't even notice the steward that joined her, taking a seat beside her, handing her a glass of water. She sniffled, wiping her face with the back of her hand as she mustered just enough energy to return a polite smile and accept the glass. "It'll be okay" the stranger tried to assure her, but they both knew the emptiness of her words.

She looked up at the girl through blurred vision and shook her head "It won't." she sipped the water "For years I kept putting it off, promising myself that tomorrow, tomorrow I would tell him, but tomorrow came and I'd always put it off a day. Now I'll never get the chance to tell him, I'll probably never see his arrogant, self obsessed, gorgeous face ever again." She closed her eyes and laughed, "I'll never get the chance to prove everyone right."

"What about?" the steward asked as the plane raced down the runway, pulling them back into their chairs.

"I'll never get the chance to tell Harvey Specter that I love him, that I've loved him all along."

* * *

**LALALA, prologue! I don't know a thing about the US government, the witness protection program or generally anything, so forgive me. I am so excited for this story, it's not going to be doom and gloom and a happy ending is always in store, so tell me what you think. If I hear good things, ill continue, if not ill just focus on Crossing the boundaries of Pretend until I come up with something else.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Then;**

He couldn't tell you how long he'd been staring at her cubicle through the glass wall of his office, just staring at her vacant office chair wondering where the hell she was. Donna was never late, Donna never did sick days, in fact, in the past, Harvey had made up excuses, just to get her out of the office. So…where was she now?

He knew that realistically there could be a hundred or more reasons as to why his executive assistant was currently nowhere to be seen, the firm is a big place, there's a lot of work to be done, and although she was hired to work alongside him, she was by no means solely exclusive to him. But it was way after midday and no one had seen her, he had asked Jessica, Mike, even Louis, but no one had seen the red haired wonder. His gaze moved away from the cubicle as he picked up his phone for what felt like the thousandth time, pressing 1 on his speed dial as he silently hoped that this time would be the time she finally answered.

"Come on Donna" he muttered in a combination of frustration and worry. "Answer your goddamn phone." Nothing. He ran his hands through his hair, taking a deep breath as he tried to push the worry out of the forefront of his mind, she would turn up, he thought, she had to.

* * *

Work dragged by painfully slowly that day and the next, his meetings made no sense, he had no idea what he was doing, so he just stared, and stared, hoping that if he stared long enough, she'd magically waltz into his office and scold him for being so unproductive. He knew he was probably being stupid, worrying over nothing, people can go off the grid for a couple of days, doesn't mean they're dead in a ditch somewhere, he thought.

He silently picked up an empty glass, grabbing his decanter of scotch, pouring himself a generous drink, letting the contents of the glass slip down his throat effortlessly in one go. His face scrunched up as the warm sensation burned his throat, the alcohol instantly going to his head, letting his body relax, even if it was only for a moment. Not even a flicker of hesitation went through his mind as he poured himself another glass, drinking that just as quickly, repeating the action until his head was successfully swimming in incoherent thoughts. Placing his hand flat against the window, he propped his heavy body up, staring out at the New York Skyline, wondering if she was out there, amongst the concrete jungle, playing some cruel prank on him, making him sweat.

Mike silently watched his boss from the hallway, a frown on his lips. He let out a shaky breath, his mind racing as he fought the urge to run in there and tell him what he knew. He pulled out the folded piece of paper in his hands, addressed specifically to the younger man, a simple piece of paper with a few words typed out. But it was those few words that explained so much. His shoulders felt heavy, the weight of the information he had been told, too much for him to handle. After all, how was he supposed to watch his mentor, his friend, live in a state of constant worry over the sudden disappearance of someone so close to him, when he knew where she was.

Well he didn't know a specific location, but he knew she was safe, he vaguely knew why she had gone and what little choice she had in the matter. Donna was undoubtedly the glue that kept them all together, she was the silent 'fixer', the confidant, she was…Donna. They were inevitably destined for failure without her, and he was going to do everything within his power to reunite his boss with the red head he cared for more than he was willing to let on.

* * *

**_Now;_**

"Harvey, you need to get up." Mike looked at the older man with a sympathetic look, trying to be the rock his mentor so desperately needed. Harvey groaned in annoyance, shielding his eyes from the blaring sun as Mike ripped open the curtains. "You're already an hour late for work, get your ass up now, before Jessica skins you alive."

Harvey squinted, grunting loudly as he pulled his body into a sitting position, his head pounding, still convinced the room was spinning. "Jesus Harvey, how much did you have to drink last night?"

The truth was, he didn't know. He lost count after the first bottle of scotch rolled away from him. "Alright, mom, calm yourself" he shot back sarcastically, dragging the covers over his head.

"No Harvey, this is the third time in a week, you've been like this, get your shit together." Mike wanted to sound firm, he wanted to be pissed, but it was all an act, in fact, this was killing him.

Donna was gone. She had disappeared exactly a week ago, without a word, without a trace. The feisty red head, Harvey's feisty red head had vanished from his life without so much of a goodbye, and he couldn't understand why. Mike sighed as he dragged himself to Harvey's walk in closet, grabbing the nearest suit before throwing it on the bed, hoping it would motivate the man to move. "Mike give it a rest, I'm not incapacitated, I'm hung over"

He shook his head, silently walking away from Harvey as he attempted to locate his coffee machine, turning it on, hoping a fresh, hot cup of coffee would take the edge off of an unusually immature Harvey Specter.

Harvey ran his hands over his face slowly, wiping the sleep from his eyes, the dull throbbing in his head, a painful reminder of the night before, of most nights since she left. The words would never escape his lips, but he was lost without her. He was constantly worried, unable to comprehend how someone could just…vanish.

He had called her a million times, visited her apartment morning and night, called her parents, even hired a private investigator to try and locate her whereabouts but…nothing.

Today was the day his new secretary was scheduled to start, Donna's replacement. It wasn't his idea; in fact, he was determined to keep her desk unoccupied until she returned; yet Jessica had other plans. He had gone to work yesterday to find some menial employee he had never seen before in his life, clear her desk. He may have gone a little crazy, or in the words of Harvey Specter, he lost his shit.

Big time.

It was there where Mike found his boss pinning a poor defenceless guy against the wall, throat around his neck, threatening the kid.

Harvey reluctantly dragged his sorry body out of bed, slowly shuffling across the hardwood floor towards the bathroom, turning on the shower, hoping that the cold water would wake him up.

"You look approximately 45% less shit " Mike observed twenty minutes later as Harvey emerged from his bedroom, dressed in a navy Tom Ford suit, his red tie hanging crookedly around his neck. "Here" he handed the older man a cup of coffee, flicking through a case file as Harvey slowly sipped on the steaming liquid.

"Charming" Harvey mused, rubbing his temples.

Mike slid two Advil across the counter "Please take these. You're incredibly intolerable when you're hung over."

"You're incredibly intolerable all the goddamn time"

"God" Mike breathed, "Donna was a fucking saint putting up with you all these years."

Harvey tensed up, his hands balling into fists "Is" he clarified "Is." Mike looked at the man confused "you said was. Don't put Donna in the past tense, she's coming back. She'll be back just you wait and see. I know Donna."

Mike frowned, nodding curtly,_ If only he knew._

* * *

Mike followed his mentor into the building, balancing his suitcase and two coffees as he hurriedly walked across the marble floor, sliding into the elevator as the doors began to shut. Harvey grunted as an incoming crowd of people filtered into the elevator, barricading him into the corner. Mike attempted to contain a laugh as he watched his boss get squashed against the walls of the elevator, anger and frustration evident on his face.

"Good ride?" Mike asked amused, handing his boss a coffee.

"Mike, do you know who that guy is?" Harvey asked, indicating towards the man in a black suit pretending to act nonchalantly in the corner reading a newspaper. Mike shrugged "He's been here every day for a week, I haven't seen him in any meetings, or depositions, I'm not even sure he's a client."

"It's a big firm" Mike pointed out, narrowing his eyes at the man, wondering whether or not he was one of the men Donna had told him about, one of the men sent to look after Harvey.

Harvey shrugged, knowing that Mike was right. "Oh hell no" Harvey stopped in front of Donna's cubicle, his eyes widening as he watched some middle aged woman, unpack her cardboard box of belongings, shoving the remainder of Donna's stuff into a bag. "What the hell do you think you're doing?!" he exclaimed, throwing himself towards the cubicle, grabbing Donna's stuff, hugging it to his body tightly, defensively. "Who the hell are you?"

"Well I take it you're Mr Specter" she extended her hand out towards the man, her nasally voice already getting on his nerves. He unsubtly gave her the once over, a look of inadequacy spread across his face. Harvey had always been judgemental, It was one of the qualities that came hand in hand with being a hard ass lawyer, but he normally had the ability to hide it. Right now, however, not so much.

He nodded, ignoring her handshake "and you are?" he asked bluntly, forgetting his manners as Mike looked at the woman apologetically

"Trisha, Trisha Martin. Your new secretary." She gave him a tight-lipped smile, obviously intimidated by the man standing in front of her. She was everything Donna was not; shy, conservative, reserved, he already hated her.

"Until Donna get's back."

She shook her head "I'm sorry Mr Specter, but my contract says I've taken on a permanent role as your secretary here at Pearson Specter."

Harvey shook his head, his expression hard, there was no way he was allowing that to happen Donna was coming back, and when she did, this woman was gone "And my contract says I'm your boss therefore allowing me to decide your future."

Harvey rolled his eyes, walking away and into his office before he lost his temper at an innocent woman for not being Donna. Mike gave the woman an apologetic smile "I'm sorry he's not usually like that" he muttered, scurrying off behind Harvey.

"Well, that was rude"

"Shut your goddamn mouth and read this file before I kick your ass on the street" Mike rolled his eyes, grabbing the file from Harvey's hand.

"You're such an ass."

* * *

**Now;**

She let out a long sigh, grabbing her back as she let go of the sofa, her eyes scanning the room as she admired her handy work. It wasn't her beautiful apartment in Brooklyn, but it was all she had, and she had to make the best out of a fucked up situation. She wiped her forehead, pushing up the sleeves of her t-shirt, a frown forming on her lips, _damn this heat_, she thought, there was a reason she had never visited Arizona before, and this was it. She was living in an inferno, with a substandard wardrobe, hundreds of miles away from the life she loved.

She threw herself on the sofa, grabbing the latest issue of people magazine as she turned on the TV, flicking through the channels until she landed on The Mindy Project, a small smile creeping on her lips. If she couldn't live in New York City, she was going to live vicariously through Mindy Lahiri.

She jumped off her seat excitedly as the phone rang, her eyes flickering to the clock to check the time. "Hello?" she answered hopefully, silently praying that this wasn't some government official. Not that she didn't love hearing the authoritative male voices on the end of the line, or the fact that there was a team of individuals looking after her, ensuring her safety.

"I miss you." She smiled at the sound of his voice.

"I miss you too kid, people here are weird." She threw herself down on the sofa, propping herself up with her arm.

"You know, you really shouldn't say that if you want to make any friends" he pointed out

"I have friends Mike, I just cant see them at the moment because some domestic terrorist is on to me." Silence fell between them as the question that they both knew was coming hung on the tip of her tongue. "How is he, Mike?"

She heard him sigh on the other end of the phone, just imagining him running his hands through his hair, pouting. He looked around, knowing that he was alone on the roof of Pearson Specter, what was he supposed to say? If he told her the truth, it would only upset her, it would only make matters worse. "He's pretty torn up" it wasn't a lie he was, "he's keeping himself to himself, he doesn't really want to be in anyone's company" _besides Scotch, _the kid thought. "It sucks that we cant tell him you're okay Donna."

She frowned, expecting as much. "Blame the government for that one" she tried to joke, "besides, a vacation from Harvey Specter was long overdue, the government is doing me a favour" It was a lie, they both knew that.

"it's not going to be forever, Donna. I'm going to do everything I can to get this case closed" he promised, sincerely, making her smile. "As soon as they're off our books, you can come home, right?"

I shrugged, knowing he couldn't see me "I don't know Mike, I'd like to think so. But they don't think either of us will be safe until they've got the guys. Who knows how long that's going to be? Could be a few days, it could be months. Until then, Donna Paulsen is out and Sarah King is in"

"Sarah King, is that what you're called?"

"Yeah, generic right? If they had taken just one look at me before they issued me my new identity, they would have picked a more fitting, majestic, sophisticated name."

Mike rolled his eyes, smiling, Donna's sarcasm, even if from hundreds of miles away, comforting him. "Oh yeah, and what would you like to be called?"

She furrowed her eyebrows "Well, Donna of course. There is no better name."

"It's nice to see that your move hasn't affected the size of your ego." Mike joked

"Well you know, I did need an extra seat just for my ego, but when you get stuffed on a private secret government jet, that wasn't an issue."

Mike looked at his watch, mentally cursing as he realised he had already been out of the office for far too long, Harvey was going to kill him. "Donna, I have to go" he admitted sadly, causing her to frown.

"Duty calls, aye?"

"Something like that"

"Speak to you soon?" she asked hopefully, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Of course, I'll call you after work tomorrow. Keep out of trouble Donna"

"I'll try" she smiled sadly, feeling all emotional. She always got emotional at the end of his calls, sad that the small piece of her old life had to come to an end. "Look after him, will you?" she asked, not mentioning his name, but he knew who she was referring to.

"I'll do my best, but we both know what Specter is like. Speak soon, Donna"

"Bye pup"

He hung up, stuffing his phone into his pocket, trying to wipe the frown off of his face as he made his way from the roof to the 50th floor.

"Finally!" Harvey exclaimed as Mike entered his office, his face full of rage as Mike winced, knowing that he was about to get verbally assaulted by the older man. "Where the hell have you been? I do not put my ass on the line on a daily basis to have you slacking off!"

"I err" he quickly tried to make up a story "I went for lunch, I'm sorry"

"You went for lunch three hours ago, why don't you try again, and this time, tell the goddamn truth."

Mike hesitated; he hated being put on the spot. He could lie like a pro, but when it came to lying to Harvey Specter he would just freeze up and become a stuttering mess. "I eat a bad burrito, I err… I was in the bathroom"

Harvey shook his head, dismissing him with a wave of the hand, accepting the excuse as he threw a case file towards the kid. "Just take this and go and figure out how the hell we're going to get out of this mess." Mike nodded slowly, getting up off the chair just as quickly as he sat down, wordlessly accepting the file. "And I don't expect to see you, until it's done."

Harvey watched the kid leave as he let out a long sigh, pushing his chair away from the desk as he got up on to his tired feet, his hangover still present, even after all these hours.

Harvey rolled his eyes as he picked up Mike's phone, wondering how the hell someone so attached to technology could leave his phone behind. His shook his head, knowing that he should just press the lock screen but his eyebrows furrowed at the sight of Mike's incoming and outgoing call list.

"Who the hell is Sarah King?" he muttered out loud, racking his brain to locate the name. He shrugged, shamelessly scrolling through the list, noticing that he had called her every day over the last week. Who the hell was this chick?

…Was Mike cheating on Rachel? Anger bubbled up inside him at the thought of Mike being unfaithful to Rachel, how the hell could he do such a cruel thing to another human being? Harvey blew out a breath, throwing Mike's phone onto the sofa, it bouncing onto the floor. Harvey could accept practically all flaws when it came to people; he worked with some of the sleaziest, most disgusting people on the face of the planet, but adulterers he could not deal with.

With Donna gone, Harvey knew that Mike was the only person in the goddamn City that he could tolerate, and he couldn't deal with the thought of kicking him to the curb because he reminded him of his adulterous mother. Harvey silently vowed, glass of scotch in hand that he was going to figure out who the hell Sarah King, he was not prepared to lose someone else.

* * *

**Okay well this was the first real chapter of Maps, I hope you liked it. It's darker than CTBOP, but its hard to write an original story with two well established characters, as another author rightly pointed out to me. This chapter is very much trying to sound the foundations before I jump head first into the story.**

**Today is the day of updates so check out everything. Let me know what you think. I'm still uncertain on this story, so give me your opinions on whether or not I should continue this.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Harvey**

"Something is going on" Harvey muttered as his eyes scanned the hallway outside of his office, speaking to himself. He just knew it. Besides his obvious talent of practicing law, Harvey prided himself on being able to read people and situations, and ever since Donna had mysteriously vanished from his life, something wasn't quite right.

Well obviously something wasn't quite right, who was he kidding, but the firm felt different, a little more on edge, almost as if it were being observed. He shook his head, trying to knock the thought out of his brain, if the firm was being watched, he would know about it, after all he was named partner, anything he didn't know wasn't worth knowing. Right?

Besides Jessica told him everything, knowing the day that Harvey is kept out of the loop, is the day shit hits the fan and things get nasty. Unless she didn't even know herself? But if Jessica didn't even know that Pearson Specter was being watched, who the hell was behind it?

He sighed, taking a large sip of his now cold coffee, his face scrunching up in disgust as his eyes landed on his assistant, her smug expression getting under his skin. "I hate that bitch"

"Harvey" Mike scolded as he entered his office "what have I told you about bad mouthing your assistant?"

"I don't know _mom_, what have you told me?"

Mike rolled his eyes, throwing a file down in front of the older man with a smirk, changing the subject "We've got the bastards."

"What?" he asked, eyes lighting up with curiosity as he quickly grabbed the file, flicking through it.

"Yep. There is no way they can come back from this. It's a sure fire win for us."

Harvey smiled, nodding in appreciation "Nice work"

Mike stuck his chest out proudly "I know, I'm pretty fucking special."

"Yeah, about as special as Forest Gump."

"Hey!" Mike exclaimed "that's rude."

Harvey pushed his chair away from his desk, grabbing the file before handing it back to the kid "Stop crying and get your ass to Conference Room B, I'm letting you tell them the good news."

Mike beamed, practically running down the corridor as Harvey followed behind him, his eyes scanning the hallways, the faces that had become familiar over the last few weeks, faces that didn't quite fit into place. Harvey stopped in front of Jessica's office, knocking on the glass door as she signalled for him to enter.

"Harvey, what have you done this time?" she sighed, putting her pen down as she looked at the man pointedly

Shaking his head, he sat down "Surprisingly nothing, but I wanted to talk to you about something."

Jessica leant back in her chair, raising an eyebrow "By all means."

"Have you noticed anything odd about this place recently?"

"Like what?"

Harvey leant forward, blowing out a breath as he lowered his voice "I know I'm going to sound crazy but here me out..."

* * *

**Donna**

"Are you kidding me?" She breathed as she looked at the document that had been placed in front of her. Donna slowly raised her gaze as she looked at the government official that she had come to known as 'Carl' with a look of disgust. "You want me to be a waitress?"

The man nodded "That's what the boss has ordered." he snickered to himself, finding the lame pun hilarious. Carl had become her closest acquaintance in this godforsaken town, slowly becoming a friend, a confidant amongst all of the madness. Sure he worked for the people that were keeping her away from Harvey and New York, but he wasn't a bad guy, in fact he was quite the opposite.

"I'm sorry but Donna Paulsen does not serve people, people serve Donna." She folded her arms across her chest, looking highly unimpressed.

"But Sarah King does" he pointed out, leaning back into the cheap sofa they had supplied her with.

She rolled her eyes, letting out an exaggerated breath "I hate Sarah fucking King." she mumbled, acting out like a child, her patience incredibly thin today. For the most part, Donna had kept it together since she left, holding onto the promise that it wont be forever, but even the strongest of people have their 'off' days.

Today was an 'off' day.

Donna scrunched her mouth to the side as she took the uniform out of Carl's hands, placing it beside her "Chin up Donna" he reassured her "the net is closing in on this gang, as soon as we have enough evidence to track them all down and put them away, you'll be on the first flight home."

"You say that like I should be happy? What happens if you don't get all of them? Or you make a mistake? No one has told me _anything_. Am I even at risk? Is Harvey even safe? Do you guys even know what you're doing?" she exclaimed, throwing her hands in the air, face turning red.

She wanted a reaction, something that she could get angry with, but the man remained neutral, diffusing the situation immediately "We know what we're doing Donna, I assure you that."

She rolled her eyes, throwing her head back against the sofa pillow "Right..." she replied unconvinced. "I just don't understand why you cant tell Harvey that I'm alive, that I'm doing okay."

"Protocol, Donna."

"Screw protocol! I'm allowed one non-family member contact that cant be Harvey. How does that make any sense whatsoever."

"Because we cant allow you to contact obvious connections. The authorities were lenient enough to allow you any form of contact with anyone, you should be grateful."

She wanted to slap him, to wipe that stern expression off of his face, goddamn irritating man, she thought. "You know that I could contact him..." She could just go and buy a disposable phone, find a computer, it wasn't rocket science.

"But you wouldn't" he challenged. "You wouldn't risk his safety, it's clear that you care about him."

"He's just my boss." she said firmly.

It was his turn to roll his eyes as he took a sip of his coffee "Yeah right, and pigs fly."

"You know Carl, I'll tell your boss that you're gossiping instead of doing your job."

"My job is to check in on you and make sure that you're coping okay." he smiled.

"You're a goddamn smart ass, you know that right? Who the hell has a psychology PhD and works for the government all by the age of what...12?"

"How many times do I have to tell you, I'm 28."

"You're practically a foetus." she shot back with a smirk

"It's okay Donna, I know it must be hard for you, being reminded of what it was like to be young, the 70's must have been an amazing decade to be partying in."

Donna's mouth fell open as she gasped, feigning offence "You bitch, I'm in my prime."

She smiled, shaking her head as she looked at the cheap polyester uniform "God if Harvey saw me in this he would wet himself laughing, he thinks polyester is the devil of all clothing."

Carl nodded, smiling knowingly, as he kept quiet. In his line of work he was frequently assigned to cases where individuals had suddenly been forced into a protection programme, where it was his job to ensure their mental stability was in check and that they were sufficiently coping with their 'new life'. From the number of weeks he had spent in Donna's company it had become painfully obvious where her attachments lie, who she missed and who she was desperate to get back to. All of which could be answered in one word- Harvey.

Carl clapped his hands together before pushing himself off of the sofa "Right you, go get yourself ready, can't be late for your first shift, got to make a good first impression."

"Fine" she huffed, seeing him out. "If you even think about coming to visit me at work tonight, I cut off your balls and put them in the deep fat fryer."

He laughed, his eyes widening at her creative threat. "It's a chargeable offence, threatening a government official."

She pushed him out the door, playfully "I'll just hire the best goddamn lawyer I know" she replied, before realizing what she had said, her smiling faltering.

"Bye Donna" he said his farewells, knowing what her words had done to her. "It's not going to be forever."

"Yeah." _If you say so._

* * *

**Harvey**

"There's something about these guys that I really don't like" Harvey stated as he and Mike walked into his office, taking a seat across from one another. "I don't know what it is about them, I just don't trust them."

"Do you trust anyone?" Mike asked, raising his eyebrow

"True." He sighed "I don't know, If Donna was here she would have read them like a book by now."

"Harvey..." Mike warned

"I know, I know." Harvey had told Mike to change the subject or tell him off every time he mentioned Donna at work, knowing that it would only be a downwards spiral if not. "It's just weird not having her here. That new bitch is fucking annoying. I mean look" he pointed out towards the hallway "Who the hell wears plaid and polka dot together, that right there is a fashion crime."

"And what the hell do you know about fashion crimes?"

Harvey shrugged, a small smile playing at his lips "You don't even want to know the amount of times I've come back to the office after hours to find Donna watching some fashion police programme, glass of wine in her hand. The woman thinks she owns the place."

Mike frowned at his use of tense, still putting her in the present, meaning that he was still finding it difficult to come to terms with her absence. "She sure is something" he quietly agreed. Mike opened his mouth to change the subject when Harvey's phone rang.

Holding up a finger to silence Mike he looked at his caller ID, his stomach sinking at the sight of the name on the screen. He let out a shaky breath, slowly raising the phone to his ear, Mike watching the older man quizzically. "Collins, please tell me you're calling me to invite me to a game of poker..."

Collins, or Michael Collins had been a friend of Harvey Specter's for a handful of years, meeting on a case way back in the day where Harvey was a prosecutor for the DA's office. But like the vast majority of his friends, their friendship was based on a mutual knowledge that they were fundamentally using one another for a string of favours.

"No Harvey I wish I was. I've got someone who fits the description." Harvey's blood ran cold, the colour draining from his face as he looked around his office, looking for something to grip on to. He tried to remain composed, aware that his associate was still watching him with growing concern, but his heart was pounding against his chest, each breath becoming shallower.

"Harvey are you okay?" whispered, noticing how pale his boss had gone suddenly, his hands shaking by his side. Harvey looked at him briefly his face void of emotion before turning to look out of the window.

"Are you sure Collins?" he asked, desperate for clarification, silently hoping he heard wrong.

"Female in her mid-thirties, shoulder length auburn hair, hazel eyes, slim build, approximately 5'8"

"O-okay" the lawyer stuttered "I'll be there in 20." Harvey hung up the phone, stuffing it slowly into his pocket as he took a moment to let the weight of the situation bare down him, too afraid to turn around face Mike at the risk that he would figure it out. "Mike I've got to go somewhere, just keep an eye on things, I'll be back in the morning."

"Do you need me to come with you?" He asked, trying to work out if it was work or personal.

"No" he sighed, turning around, his eyes glistening, his teeth digging into his bottom lip. "Its none of your concern Mike." Mike watched the man hurry past him, phone already raised to his ear, asking Ray how quickly he could get to the office. Mike sighed, looking towards Harvey's desk as he notice a new addition to it, after all, he had a photographic memory, if he didn't notice things like this, it would be weird. He picked up the small photo frame placed carefully in the corner of his desk, hidden behind a stack of files, out of sight to the average eye as a sad smile crept onto his face.

It was a picture of Harvey and Donna, smiling at the camera, his arm wrapped protectively around her shoulder. He ran his free hand through his hair, a dull throbbing pain radiating in his temples, he couldn't keep this charade up much longer. Keeping secrets was something Mike had gotten used to over recent years, hiding his true identity from the world, but this... well this was just about killing him.

And if it was killing him, imagine what it was doing to Harvey.

What would happen if he just told Harvey? What if he just told him that she was okay, that this (hopefully) wasn't going to be forever, to give him just a little reassurance. He knew that it would be a federal offence to tamper with an official investigation, especially one of this nature, but it's not like he wasn't used to bending the rules, teasing the boundaries of the law. "No" he said out loud to himself, he couldn't, he couldn't do anything, he had to remain powerless, forced to watch his friend go out of his mind, jumping to the worst possible conclusions.

Grabbing Harvey's decanter off of the side table he poured himself a generous drink, knocking it back quickly as his fingers scrolled down his contact list until it fell on 'Sarah King'.

* * *

Ray pulled up outside the modern looking building, a building with too much glass Harvey thought, for a coroner's office, anyway. Harvey thanked Ray, his limbs feeling heavy due to anxiety as he exited the car, staring up at the building, fear running through his veins. Michael Collins was the chief coroner of New York City, he saw more dead bodies in a day than Harvey would see cases in months, he was in an unfortunate line of business that never dried up.

Walking through the corridors felt like an eternity as he made his way to Michael's department, the middle aged man waiting for him with a solemn expression. "Harvey."

Harvey gave him a curt not, his lips pursed in a tight line "Collins."

"I'm sorry that we're not meeting under nicer circumstances, follow me." He wordlessly followed the man through a bland walkway into a plainly decorated room, a glass screen in front of him, a curtain obscuring his view of the other side. "I'm going to pull back the curtain, and if it is in fact Donna, I just need you to nod in confirmation, okay?"

Harvey exhaled deeply, his eyes firmly fixed on the glass window as he ran his tongue over his dry lips "O-okay."

Harvey had found himself calling Collins regarding Donna's disappearance before he called her parents, his brain jumping to the worst possible conclusions. Collins had promised Harvey that the moment anyone who remotely fitted Donna's description came in, he would be called immediately, and until now, he hadn't had to.

Silence fell between the pair as Collins grabbed the curtain rope, looking at Harvey one final time before pulling the curtains open. Harvey gulped as his gaze fell on the woman laying on the slab, her naked body covered by a white sheet. His eyes slowly moved from her feet to her face, his mouth falling open, a small whimper escaping his lips.

He stared and started, making sure what he had seen was in fact correct. He let out a breath he didn't know he was holding, his whole body relaxing as his gaze remained on the woman laying peacefully in front of him. He knew it was wrong but he couldn't help but smile, the relief he felt indescribable, a feeling that would soon disappear again.

"It's...It's not her." He choked out "It's not her."

He loosened his tie as he exited the building, the fresh air hitting his face as he closed his eyes, leaning against the wall, taking a moment to let the storm of emotions settle. Rubbing his temples, he called Ray, his mind reeling, wondering how many times he could put himself through this.

Wondering how many times he had to go through this until he saw her, where his darkest suspicions would be confirmed, and life as he knew would crumble around him.

* * *

**Okay wow, so... sorry? I really don't like this fic now haha. Mainly because I have no idea how to fill the events from now, to the two of them meeting again. I don't even know what you guys think of this story. So if you like it, I'll continue, but if you don't I may just call it a day now.**

**Alrighty then!**

**You know what to do...**

**Baby Be mine is coming tomorrow, if you havent read it, go now. gooo. And as always, check out the one shots.**


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